Editor's Note: This is the fifth in a series of feature stories on the men who make up the Erie Fantasy Football League. In order to be featured, you must respond to the official Erie League survey.

Jody Barth/ Mike Royer-Callouses: "Jody should be thanking his lucky stars for Mike Royer because if he didn't have him his team would be absolutely nothing."

Dave Bell-Bonecrushers: "Until that guy wins a trophy he ain't squat as an owner. He should try to concentrate on one team. All his other teams (Bell plays in five different fantasy leagues) are hurting his potential. "

Mike Bell-Assassins: "I love the man. Unfortunately he owns me. "

Jim Damicone-King Salmons: "The luckiest owner in the league. Every year he seems to pull off wins with two or three players. I don't know how he does it."

Don Jones-LTP: "He's a good owner with a good team. But he's not a great owner until he comes home with the trophy. He's gonna have to get through the Atomic Punks to get it!"

Mike Kuratko-Hostile Omish: "The worst luck in the league. Every year. He probably had the best teams in '92, '93, and '94 but he just has bad luck. He always seems to have one bad week and it always happens to be during the playoffs."

Paul Labonte-Shadow Bandits: "He has the biggest mouth in the league for someone who hasn't done squat. He sure talks like he has. He talks the talk but he sure as hell don't walk the walk. He always talks about his 11-3 record (in 1996) -- What did it get him?"

Joe Nunney-Black Diamond: "I kind of feel bad for him. He's sort of the stomping dog of the league. He does live in a make believe land though if he thinks his team is somewhat decent. I thought this was supposed to be his big year. Big year for what? Flopping?"

Kirk Pavelich-Midnight Vigilantes: "Three years ago I said he was the worst owner in the league. He no longer holds that distinction. He's come a long way and he owes it all to me. I expect a thank you card sometime in the near future."

Sam Profio-Donikers-DTL: "He's another lucky one. The regular season means nothing though. Does he have a trophy?"

Brad Rzyczycki-Cosmic Monsters: "If he had more time he'd probably be a better owner. It's kind of tough to devote time for fantasy football though when you devote 24 hours of your day to coaching college football. When he's able to make time for the league he'll be tough."

Matt Rzyczycki-Captain Tripps: "He's a fellow division mate. The most overrated team in the league. He's living in a fantasy world though if he thinks he's going to win the division. If I don't win it, the Assassins will."

Storm Thomas-Gargoyles: "The biggest dreamer in the league. Talk about a one year wonder."

Bryan Vince-Psychedelic B's: "He's a wannabe Kuratko. He wants to make the trades like Kuratko but yet he just can't. And really, he's had ONE good year."

Editor's Note: All owners who would like to respond to Mr. Kuratko's comments should call me at home or e-mail me at kirkpav@concentric.net. I figure the line will be long...