The Sports Page        

Volume 9, Issue 8         The On-Line Newsletter of the Erie Fantasy Football League              Nov. 6, 2001

Owners respond to comments

GM's come out of the woodwork to answer Vince's trash talking

Two weeks ago, Blockheads GM Jody Barth -- a notorious trash talker in his own right -- said a special award should be given to the owner who talks the best game throughout the season. Even before last week's stinging commentary on his fellow owners (click here to read the feature), Psychedelic B's GM Bryan Vince (pictured right) had been proclaimed this year's smack talking king by Barth. 

Considering his team's recent play on the field, that award looks to be the only honor Vince's squad will be in line for come season's end.

The B's have now lost three straight to drop back to 4-4. In Week Seven, they lost 72-68 to Titlebound Two, followed by a 71-46 defeat at the hands of the King Salmons. This week, the B's were on the short end against Lardass, 83-78. Worse news yet for the flamboyant Vince was that he almost staged a rally for the ages. Coming into Monday Night, he needed 50 points to pull out a victory. Instead, he could only muster 45. Gibby's GM Jason Gillespie (pictured below left), who Vince called "the league's first Albino owner," had strong words for his Brown Division rival.

"Albino???" Gillespie said. "Vince are you really Italian??? Oh, I see, that is just dirt you greasy stir-fried linguine eating feck. Why don't you stick a canoli in to play running back? It wouldn't hurt your score, cause you can't get any worse than zero. Nice lineup -- Warrick Dunn and Doug Chapman. This isn't golf. The lowest score doesn't win."

The LTP ownership team of Don and Tyler Jones shared similar feelings.

Said the senior Jones: "As my son found his skinny, no nuts, pussy father in the corner crying because his feelings were hurt by the insensitive comments of Bryan Vince, he leaned down and said, 'Daddy, Bryan's life has been one clusterfuck after another for a number of years now so let him have his one moment at our expense. By the way, quote me as saying, Fuck Him!!'"

"I can predict Vince's response," Jones added. "'I know that Tyler must have said that because DJ is too much of a pussy.'" 

Titlebound Two co-owner Brett Harney attempted to break down the smack talk that Vince had called "too intellectual."

"In response to the Psychedelic B's owner Bryan Vince not understanding the 'high level smack' that the Doniker's DTL and Titlebound Two have dished his way, I will try to make this as easy to understand as possible for Bryan," Harney said. "Vince - your team sucks. Our team is better than your team. Our team has a
better record than yours. Our team beat your team in week #7 because we scored more points than you. You will notice that I didn't use over a two syllable word in discussing this. I hope I didn't talk over his head. Must be tough going through life with a 3rd grade mentality." 

Stonehenge GM Jamie Roush (pictured below right), one of three 5-3 teams tied for the Groza Division lead, took exception to Vince's one word comment of "Who?"

"Who??" Roush said. "I've got your who! Oh...I forgot...that big 46 point week entitles you to run mouth about having a shitty team for another week. It seems that by your standards, 46 points is a big week so you'll probably mouth off about it anyway. You've had one good week all season!!!  Three of your four wins are against teams that are 2 and 5!! I've wasted too much time already responding to your weak ass! I just hope that I get to play you in the playoffs -- if you make it."

In the games that are played ON the field, the strangely quiet Keith Kuratko watched his Atomic Punks break the century mark for the second straight week and fourth time this season. The Punks, who were led by QB Steve McNair's 37 point performance, topped last week's 123 point effort and buried Kirk Pavelich's Midnight Vigilantes 128-87.

"I don't even know why the rest of us are still paying attention," Pavelich said. "The Punks are solid up and down. I see no reason that Keith doesn't win his first championship since the days when they still played with leather helmets."

LTP pulled off a huge Monday Night rally to upend the Polish Monarchs and maintain the top seed in the All-American Conference. Jones' club erased a 12 point deficit to Mike Szydlowski's club by posting 45 points in the Oakland-Denver prime time matchup. On the flip side, Steve Suder's PP Brains blew a 14 point Monday Night lead to Barth's Blockheads and lost 74-64. As a result, the PP Brains remain winless at 0-8.

In the Browns Conference, the 2-5 Bonecrushers and their GM Dave Bell exploded for 125 points this week in annihilating Gillespie's Gibby's 125-64. The offensive output is now the high water mark for most points in a Browns Conference game this year.

QUOTES OF THE WEEK

"Let Storm know if he wants to play out for $10 a week versus the overachievers I am game." LTP GM Don Jones, responding to Gargoyles owner Storm Thomas' comments that LTP is "an average club of overachievers that had everyone fooled by the hype."

"I don't get this assumption that the All-American is superior to the Browns conference. All I know is that the Browns Conference inherited the NY Yankees of the All-American Conference (Psychedelic B) and they are a .500 team that will probably not even make the playoffs. In return we lose another .500 team (Atomic Punks) and they are the runaway leader in the All-American in points scored, in first place in their division and most likely the team to represent that conference in the Fantasy Bowl." King Salmons owner Jim Damicone, responding to earlier comments that the All-American Conference is dominant to his Browns Conference.

"I take exception to Nunney's suggestion that I might be trying to pick up players on other team's rosters. However, I must remember that this is coming from a GM that has a lower career winning percentage than my weight." Damicone's response to Browns Conference commissioner Joe Nunney's comments on Damicone's transaction night strategies.

"Vinnie: Got to love him. High self esteem. Good looking. Smells like bacon. Awesome smacker. This pack of David's sunflower seeds goes to you. Signed Jim Rome." Polish Monarchs GM Mike Szydlowski's response to Vince's "pebble brain in a pond" smack.

Click here to read the owner profile story on JODY BARTH

Click here to read the owner profile story on BRYAN VINCE

Click here to read the owner profile story on JASON GILLESPIE

Click here to read the owner profile story on JOHN THIEM

Click here to read the owner profile story on JOE NUNNEY

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